


Silver Lining Moments

by orphan_account



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Video Blogging & YouTube RPF
Genre: AU, M/M, Phan - Freeform, Phandom - Freeform, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-02
Updated: 2014-09-30
Packaged: 2018-02-07 03:47:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1884168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan’s a mess. Broke, lost and in desperate need of love he falls into Phil’s life after a failed break in attempt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I don't wanna live this way, gonna take my things and go.

He didn’t want to do it, but he was running out of options. After running away from home it had been a never ending uphill struggled filled with nothing but disappointment and regrets. He knew he couldn't go back home to his parent’s judgement and smug looks screaming, “We told you so”. 

Acting had always been a passion for Dan, but something his parents thought was just a hobby or a childish dream. But it wasn’t just a hobby for him; it was everything he ever wanted and more. Well that’s how it seemed.

Half twelve struck and the moment had come. Dan sighed, breath instantly turning frosty stream in the bitter early morning air. He pulled his black leather coat tighter around his thin body and beanie down further as he walked up to the stairs leading up to the intended flats.

Dan may have not been as intelligent as his doppelganger Light but he certainly wasn’t dull, topping many of his classes he had a bright future what could possibly bring him to this? Petty crime? Something that could effectively end all his hopes for the future.

He began the journey up the metal death trap called stairs. Trying his hardest not to make a sound.  This apartment block was notorious for the high-end clientele living there and the quite frankly, shit security.  He walked past a few windows, noting all of them locked, except one. He smirked pulling it open; _Do I really need to do this?_ He paused asking himself about to turn away but something brought him back, something unknown to him. He sighed slipping inside; body just the right size to squeeze in without a sound.

 His eyes adjusted to the darkness, he crept in praying no one heard. Fear and adrenalin pumping through his veins, drowning out everything else but the task at hand. Creeping in further something caught his eye, a wallet and vase.  He sighed a smile walking closer, picking up the wallet off the wooden table.

“Bullshit!” Someone laughed in the near, near distance.

“Shhh Antonia I’m trying to watch.” Someone just as close called back.

Dan froze. _Shit I gotta leave._ He turned quickly, his one mistake, his elbow hit the vase throwing it to the floor, smashing on the wooden boards.

“Shit. Fuck.” Dan mumbled trying not to scream. He had fucked up. Of course.

“What the fuck was that?” The female voice called.

“I don’t know I’ll go see. Be back in a sec.” The second spoke, Dan heard footsteps coming straight for him.

Dan fell to the floor in tears. _I’m such a fucking stuff up. Fuck._ He couldn’t move, he was frozen in place. He wept in his hands waiting for his inevitable doom.

Phil sighed standing up, leaving Antonia to continue watching the horror film that was playing. Upon reaching the door he heard soft weeping confusion filled his features. He opened the door, switching on the light, expecting a stray cat wrecking his study, but instead he saw a boy, around nineteen weeping into his hands. Straightened brown hair, black jacket and jeans with matching beanie trying to hide in plain sight.

Dan looked up at the man above him, never would he have thought it’d be him, someone of the demeanour, he looked like an angel sent from heaven. Phil saw the tears in the boy’s perfect brown eyes looking up at him, his heart sank knowing what he should do but deciding against it. He thought on his feet.

“Ah shoo go get out this isn’t you house.” He half yelled as though trying to get an animal out.

Dan just looked up at the boy, who looked just as distressed as him.

“Get good.” Phil walked to the window shutting it.

“The poor vase.” He sighed walking back to the broken pieces, picking them up one by one.

“You alright babe?” Antonia called from the living area.

“Yeah all good, just another bloody stray.” He placed the vase pieces in the rubbish before walking to the doorway.

Dan was in shock. _What the fuck is he doing? He should be murdering me!_

“Stay here I’ll be back.” Phil whispered before turning the light off and walking back out. Dan didn’t know what to do, his tears grew again, he wept wondering what the boy was doing. But oh god was that boy gorgeous he looked so perfect.

Phil still didn’t understand what had happened, who was that boy? That gorgeous, tanned, brown eyed boy weeping in his study. Phil yawned standing behind Antonia on the couch, trying to think of a plan to get rid of her. He knew she would have no problem kicking the browned eyes boy out and in no way did he want that.

“You right babe?”

“Yeah I just didn’t realise how tired I am!” Phil yawned out again.

“How cliché.” Antonia turned around to look at the boy.

Phil giggled. “You know when you stand up it only then fully kicks in.”

“I know babe. It is late I should probably get going. Work tomorrow.” Antonia stood up walking to Phil.

“Awww.” Phil pouted, still glad Antonia was leaving. They had been dating nearly two months now and to Phil at least it was far from a good relationship. Only nights like this kept them together.

“Come ‘ere.” Antonia smiled kissing the boy softly. Phil kissed back trying to keep it as short as possible. Antonia pulled away and grabbed her coat leaving Phil alone, with the television still playing the background. He sighed deeply walking back to the room where the brown eyed boy lay.

Dan was still on the floor, weeping pathetically. The door reopened and he froze again only to calm a little when he saw Phil’s soft, gorgeous face. 

“Hello.” Phil smiled from the doorway, turning the light on. “I’m Phil.” He walked ever so slowly towards the boy. He knew he should just call the police and get him arrested but something was stopping him. Dan didn’t answer curling up more, revealing the cuts and scars on his arm.

“Jesus.” Phil swore moving closer to him. “Is that from the vase?” He asked kneeling down next to the boy.

Dan nodded timidly, tears still fresh on his face.

“Dear.” Phil wiped his tears.

Dan couldn’t speak, what was he doing? He should be kicking his ass yet he actually seemed to actually have some concern for Dan? What?

“Here let me help you up.” Phil sat the boy up, Dan was limp not knowing what to do and suddenly exhausted.

“Come on let me help you.” Phil sat in front of the boy wiping his eyes. “No need to cry you’re safe I’m not going to hurt you.”

Dan was so confused. He was a criminal, breaking into his house. He didn’t deserve love, he deserved handcuffs.

“We need to fix those cuts.” Phil smiled softly. “Come on let’s get you in a bath.”

Phil helped the silent boy up walking him slowly to the bathroom.

“You’re shaking dear. You’ll be warm soon enough. I promise.” Phil voice was deep and smooth yet laced with pain.

Never before had Dan had someone who seemed to care this much about him, let alone from the victim of Dan’s failed burglary. It was strange yet oddly amazing. He wanted to lay in Phil’s arms and hide away from the world as well as get the hell out of there. No one could possibly care that much about Dan without having a hidden agenda. Dan was so confused and tired; he was lost deep within his thoughts when he felt a soft hand on his cheek.

“I’m just going to take your shirt and trousers off, okay? I’ll leave your pants on okay? It will warm you up, trust me.” Dan nodded shyly, not wanting to argue. Soon he was left just in his boxers, Phil helped him into the warm bath. Dan sunk back into it, letting the water flood over his weary body.

“Better hmm?”

Dan nodded again and let a small smile slip out.

“We better clean that wound then I’ll let you sleep, understand?”

Dan smiled again and let Phil take control again.

Phil saw the boy’s open wound but was distracted by something else. Faint scars across his wrist and lower arm. He closed his eyes before softly kissing the scars on the boy’s tanned skin. He looked at the boy, the perfect boy in front of him. He didn’t know what he was doing but it felt right and that’s all that mattered.


	2. This is the start of something beautiful.

Phil helped the boy out of the bath, wounds cleaned and relaxed a little more.  Dan thanked Phil softly, looking at the cuts.

“Thank you… Phil.” He didn’t make eye contact with the boy. Phil sighed softly at the boy, towel and hair naturally wavy. He was incredibly cute; Phil couldn’t help but have a small crush on him. Though he shouldn’t have, he broke into Phil’s house tried to steal his wallet. Why should he give him the time of day? But something about this boy was special, he couldn’t let him rot away, he needed Phil’s help.

“I’ll be back in just a moment, I’ll go get you some warm clothes. Aright?”

Dan nodded timidly. He still didn’t know what was going on. _Is this a sick game of his? Put me in a false sense of security?_ Phil arrived back a few minutes’ later, old shirt and cloud pyjama bottoms in hand.

“Here let me help you…” He smiled helping Dan with the shirt and pants. “They’re much better eh?”

Dan nodded again still no making eye contact, waiting for the inevitable pain.

“C’mon dear we’ll put you to bed.” Dan looked up, fear striking his eyes. He looked around trying a way to escape.

“Hey, hey, hey.” Phil spoke softly, resting his hand on Dan’s cheek.  “Don’t worry, I’m not going to hurt you. I have a spare bedroom next to mine, you can sleep in there, and I’ll be in mine, you in yours. Understand?” He tilted his head.

Dan’s soft smile was back; to drained to ask questions he left Phil lead him to the bed. Phil opened up the covers and helped Dan lay down. He pulled them up covering the boy’s shivering body.

Dan hadn’t slept in something so comfortable in months. Living on the street, lucky to have a blanket, all he wanted to do was sleep and never wake up.

Phil sighed walking away. _What am I doing?_ He asked walking out turning the light off, knowing the boy would fall away straight away. He was right. Dan fell asleep almost instantly. Phil smiled walking to his bed, falling asleep almost as quick only to be woken several hours later by the late winter morning sun.

“Better go check on him.” Phil yawned sitting up, he never bothered to change out of his tracksuit pants or take his contacts out. His eyes were irritated and red. He sighed pulling himself out of bed walking to the bathroom taking out his contacts putting his glasses on instead.

It was quarter past eleven and Phil had nowhere else to be. He wondered if the boy did, probably not. He opened the door quietly and leaned on the doorframe. The boy was just waking up, confused and dazed. Phil watched him cloudily look around and wipe his eyes. He was brought out of it quick and fast with the boy’s harsh tone.

“You going to stare at me all day?” Phil snapped up.

“Pardon?” Phil asked in shock.

“Oh shit. I didn’t- shit. No.” The boy panicked. “I thought you were! I got confused I’m so sorry please don’t hurt me.” He cowered behind the doona.

Phil laughed. “I’m not going to hurt you. I’m glad you can actually speak this morning.”

Dan blushed. “I’m so sorry.” He blurted out never looking up, to embarrassed too.

Phil sighed. “Let’s not talk about that hmm? Just tell me.” He paused walking closer, setting down on the farthest corner of the bed. “What’s your name?”

Dan paused. “Daniel. But call me Dan.”

“Okay Daniel but call me Dan.” Phil had a goofy smile, which made Dan feel instantly better.

“How old are you Dan?”

“I’m twenty.” Dan looked down.

“Is Phil short for Philip?” Dan asked quietly, not sure if he should. But he was curious.

Phil nodded. “It is. Philip Michael Lester.” He smiled putting out his hand for the boy to shake.

“Daniel James Howell.” They shook hands and Phil giggled.

“That’s how we should have met Mr Howell.”

Dan smiled awkwardly. “I’m so sorry you should honestly just kick my ass. I don’t deserve this.”

“Everyone deserves a second chance.”

“Not me…”

“Especially you.” Phil smiled making the boy feel better. _Maybe I am worth it?_ The questioned flickered in his mind for less than a second before being shot down. Phil was wonderful but what was hidden behind that. The thought worried Dan.

_What is wrong with you?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading ^^


	3. See the flames inside my eyes, it burns so bright I wanna' feel your love.

“How about some breakfast?” Phil smiled slowly standing up. They had been talking nearly an hour now, taking about music, television shows, film and everything else that weren’t to personal. Phil was a little hesitant to ask Dan to personal questions, worried that he’d run. But as the conversation continued he felt more and more connected (and attracted) to the young man. 

“Oh no I can’t I should go… Thank you so much though Phil.” Dan pulled the covers off, beginning to get up.

“Daniel, I will not have you leave here without food.”

“But I don’t deserve your food.”

“I know. But that doesn’t mean you won’t get it.”

Dan sighed sitting back a little.

“Phil why are you doing this?” Tears begun to stain his voice. “I’m a useless piece of shit.”

“No.” Phil moved closer brushing his hand over the side of Dan’s face. “In all honestly I like you. I know I shouldn’t but there is something about you Dan. So please let me make you breakfast.”

Dan wiped away tears.

“You…” He didn’t know what else to say. He was so confused. _What the fuck is wrong with him?_

 

The pair made their way to the kitchen. Dan and Phil decided on a recipe, French toast and begun pulling out the ingredients.

“So Dan…” Phil smiled cracking an egg. The boy truly was gorgeous, hair wavy and messy, skin perfectly tanned. Phil didn’t understand. “Do you live ‘round here?”

“Ah. Well no but yeah kind of.”

Phil looked up confused.

“Kind of?”

“I ah.” Dan paused, embarrassment over his features. “I don’t really have a home per say.”

“What?” Phil asked putting the egg down he was cracking.  “You’re homeless?”

Dan nodded timidly. “I could have a home, if I went back to my parents. But that’d be a fucking nightmare.”

“Do you work?”

“Sort of.”

Phil raised an eyebrow. “Sort of?”

“I have a job at Tesco but they hardly ever put me on.” Dan frowned. “What about you?” He asked, not sure if he should.

“It will probably sound funny but I’m a YouTuber.”

Dan shook his head in confusion.

“A YouTuber?”

“Yeah! I make videos on YouTube.”

“Really?” Dan bit his lip smiling. “That’s so cool.”

“You think?” Phil smiled, beginning to mix the egg mixture.

“Yeah! It’s fucking awesome.” Dan’s smile was incredible; his dimple was showing and Phil’s heart melted. “What kind do you do?” He asked walking around the other side of the island that Phil was mixing the ingredients on. He rested his head on his arms looking up at the boy. It was strange; Dan and Phil were complete and utter strangers, but something clicked between them, an instant spark that could only be described as eclectic. Phil never wanted to stop talking to him. Phil smiled down at Dan, looking into his chocolate eyes. Never wanting to look away.

“Vlogs I guess. It’s really fun!”

“That’s so cool. I wish I could do that.”

“You could.” Phil smiled. “I bet everyone would love you.”

“No they wouldn’t. I’m a fucking mess.”

Phil pouted. “You’re gorgeous.”

Dan lifted his head, taking a step back.

“What?”

Phil closed his eyes. “Daniel James Howell, you are honestly the most attractive human being on the planet.”

“Says you.” Dan smirked, blushing bright red. They got lost in each other’s smile for a moment before Dan brought them back. “So what’s your name?”

“My name?” Phil tilted his head.

“YouTube name?”

“Oh eh AmazingPhil.”

Dan bit his lip. “How fitting.”

Phil blushed, dipping the bread into the egg mixture.

“I’ll have to watch you. When I can get onto the internet.”

“If you want you can watch it now… Only if you want.”

“I would love to.” Dan smiled.

“Okay I’ll be back in a sec.” Phil wiped his hands on the tea towel and disappeared off into his room, being back his laptop, covered in stickers.

He placed it on the bench and unlocked it, opening up YouTube.

“This is one my favourite. It was so fun to film!”

Dan walked around and smiled when it begun playing. The video was near perfect, everything from the filming to editing to colour to lighting to Phil himself. Dan felt a strange mix of jealousy and pride. Never before had he wanted to be with or be someone before so badly.  He wanted to be loved by him, but why would he be. He was a fuck up and Phil was this. Amazing. He was literally AmazingPhil. Dan didn’t have a chance.


	4. I'm out of touch, I'm out of love, I'll pick you up when you're getting down.

Dan was hypnotised by Phil’s videos. They were perfect. Phil watched from a distance, still cooking breakfast as the boy clicked through all the videos, making sure not to miss a moment. Phil smiled shaking his head, setting the table and putting the toast on the plates. He snuck up the boy, tapping his shoulder. Dan jumped turning to look at Phil. A smile instantly appearing.

“Sorry.” Phil laughed. “Breakfast is ready.”

“Thank you.” Dan smiled. He stood up and followed Phil to the table. “I can’t thank you enough. I owe you so much.”

Phil nodded. “You do and I have an idea of how you can make it up.”

“Hmm?” Dan asked, already eating.

“Yeah, you’re going to help me film a video and I’ll teach you how to edit.”

Dan put his fork down.

“What? Why?”

“Because I know you’ll be great. Please Dan.”

Dan sighed. “What am I supposed to do?”

“Just help me film and edit that’s all I ask.”

“Okay but you’ll see how bad I am.”

“Oh and one more thing Dan.” Phil bit his lip. “You need to start a channel.”

Dan shook his head. “No I can’t I’m not good enough. I don’t even have a camera.”

“Well good thing I do.” Phil smiled.

“But no I can’t.” Dan stared down at his food.

“Dan please, stay with me a few days, make a video see if you like it.” Phil’s eyes soft and pleading for the boy to agree.

“I can’t.”

“Why not Dan?”

“I just can’t.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Dan please just a few days.” Phil was getting frustrated he was trying to help him, but he wouldn’t have it.

Dan sighed. “No it’s not fair.”

“Dan.”

Dan sighed. “Fine but after I make the video I’m leaving and I’ll never bother you again.”

“Dan you’re not bothering me, I like you, I don’t feel so lonely.”

Dan scoffed. “Do you forget who you’re talking to, I tried to rob you but I fucking failed. I’m a failure Phil, don’t get involved.”

“No Dan you’re not. I like you really.”

Dan stood up.

“Why the fuck are you even bothering with me? I don’t deserve it, I’m a fucking failure. My own parents hate me because I wanted to follow my fucking dreams that won’t ever happen and oh because I’m gay. ‘Faggot’ he called me. My own dad.” Dan broke down, tears streaming down his face. Phil saw him fall apart so quickly. Like a house of glass, it shattered in moments. Phil stood up, Dan had ran out of the room, into ‘his’ room. Phil walked in slowly, Dan was crying on the bed.

“Dan.” Phil said softly. He walked closer, settling down next to the younger. He rubbed his back.

“Hey it’s okay Dan. I don’t think you’re a failure, you have your whole life ahead of you. Please I think you’d be great but if you really want to go than go.” Phil sighed.

Dan kept crying. Phil let little encouraging words slip out of his mouth.

“H-how?” He said quietly.

“How what?” Phil asked softly.

“H-h-how are you lonely? You’re perfect. D-don’t you have that g-girl your girlfriend?” The word ‘girlfriend’ hurt Dan as he spoke it. It left a sour taste in his mouth as it did with Phil.

Phil tilted his head. It was an odd question but he understood.

“Antonia is.” He didn’t know what to say. “She’s lovely but she isn’t right. I get sick of her after twenty minutes.” He sighed, making a slight exaggeration but he didn’t understand why he was still in a relationship with her.

“Why me?” His voice small. “Why would you want me to stay with you?” It was more to himself than Phil.  

“You’re special Dan, I know you are. Now c’mon what do you say… Will you stay?”

Dan sat up, sitting next to Phil.

He smiled.

“Fine.”

Phil’s smile grow. He hugged the boy, kissing his cheek, hoping he didn’t mind. Butterflies appeared in Dan’s stomach and he blushed dark crimson.

_How is this even reality?_

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hello so I have a phanfiction blog that I update more regularly with fics rather then here... if you were wondering what my url is it's laphana.tumblr.com so yeah it out if you like ^^


End file.
